The Swing Chair On The Porch

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Thanksgiving can be a nightmare. My marriage certainly was, and I couldn’t do anything about it. All I needed was my sexist brother-in-law hounding me, my in-laws judging me. I just want to be happy, something just has to work out. Maybe after the holidays? Something has to give, and soon.This time of year, wives brace themselves for an onslaught of family descending on their houses. I’m a nervous wreck trying to get everything together. The turkey, the decorations, and all the deep cleaning I have been doing for weeks.My mother-in-law is one thing. She’s nice with that little edge of disapproval. You know the type. But she’s nothing compared to my brother-in-law, Kevin. He’s arrogant, crass, rich and Mmmm, fucking built. He’s also a bit of a misogynist and thinks he’s god’s gift. The string of women that follow him around only confirms that for him.Last year, he came on to me. What a pig, right? He didn’t just come on to me, he came up behind me in the kitchen one night and cupped my tits. He was naked, and I felt his cock on the inside of my thigh. He was huge and as he got excited, his cock wedged between my legs just rubbing my pussy, I almost bent over for him.“What are you doing? Your girlfriend is in the other room. Oh, Jesus, you’re naked. Why are you out here naked?”“Well, I had a hold of your tits. Why do you think? And don’t give me that ‘Oh, Jesus’ bullshit. You want it.”I did. My husband and I hadn’t had sex in a while. And by the sounds of it, Kevin didn’t go more than a few hours. “I’m not one of your whores.” I stomped off and decided it was time for my husband to do the do. He did not. I got mad, we fought, and I ended up diddling myself.Fast forward eight months and I have been diddling wildly over that night. My husband is a dead fish. I have asked if he’s OK. Does he not love me? I sent him to get his testosterone checked. gaziantep ofise gelen escort I am beside myself. Then a package came. It was from Kevin who was off on some South American trip.“What’s this?” My husband asked.“Your brother sent it. It’s…I don’t know, a lot of cloth and a log?”“Let me look,” He said as I moved aside. It turned out to be a sort of hammock chair. “This is cool. I think I have just the place for it.”We have an entertainment room, sort of a back porch with a TV that doubles as a guest quarters in the holiday. My husband hung it up, and it was comfortable. I loved sitting in it and reading. It swung, so it was like a rocking chair. Little did I know.My in-laws came into town and I was getting ready to put their suitcase in the porch when my mother-in-law got a sour face. That’s not good.“What’s wrong?”“I just, you know, last year it was a bit cold out there. My old bones and all. Could we have a room inside?”“It’s a lot smaller,” I said.“Yes, but it’s closer to the bathroom. And, it’s warmer.”“Ok. Let me move some things around.”I was making the adjustment and making the bed, bending over to tuck something in, and – ‘crack!’ – my ass burst into flames as someone smacked my ass.“Ow! What the…?!” It was Kevin, sporting a new close-cropped beard. I was just about to smack him back when he grabbed my arm and pulled me in.“You got a kiss for me?” he said.“What?! No! You smacked my ass! That hurt, jerk.”Undeterred, he kissed me anyway. It was fairly quick, given I bit him. But he just laughed it off and sat on the bed. His muscled frame stretched out as he lay back.“I just made that, and this is not your room this year.”“Good, because last year I had to deal with the constant sound of you and my brother fucking. Oh, no wait, that was me. You guys gaziantep öğrenci escort were doing the yelling.”“You’re in the porch room. Like the dog you are,” I told him and left the room. He followed and went out to the porch. Where he saw the chair that my husband had hung.“I see you hung it up, so this is why you wanted me out here. Nice. I knew you would come around.”“What are you talking about?”“You didn’t read the note with it, did you?” He asked. I had not. He had sent it around my birthday and he had put a card in it for me. I opened it, stole the money, and threw it in the desk drawer.“I’ll open the couch up and get some sheets later and make the bed.”“Hey, don’t bother. I’ll just use the blankets and sleep on the couch. That way, we can use it during the day. I don’t want to be a bother.”“Really? Since when?”I went to look for the card. I looked everywhere and then finally in the last place I looked, there it was, the teal envelope. I pulled the card out. Not much to it, a picture of an alpaca fucking another alpaca – “Figures.” And then the note.Hey, I won’t be around for your birthday. I spotted this Incan fertility chair and thought about you. I can just imagine you in it, just a t-shirt. Anyway, it’s supposed to bring you happiness and all that, so, happy birthday. Get laid already!Great, an Incan fertility chair? He made that up! I’ll never be able to sit in it again knowing he thinks it’s a sex swing.“Hey, my brother arrive?” my husband asked. “We were going to go golfing.”“Yes, he’s here. Get him out of my sight,” I said, putting the note away.“You’re not still pissed about last year. Are you?”“Let’s not start again. The both of you go. I have to settle your mother in.”They left, and a few minutes later, the fun with his mother began.That night we were oğuzeli escort sitting around talking, and I went to get some drinks. Kevin appeared in the kitchen.“Need help?” he asked and startled me.“More than you can imagine. So, no slut this year? Did they all finally get smart and see through you?”“Not exactly. Maybe I just grew up.”“Oh. Good one. Carry all this out to your mom and dad. I’ll get the chips.”“Look. I don’t want this to get ugly. But, then again, I do. I thought about not using this. But you know what? I think I will. In spite of you being a little bitchy,” he said and laid what looked like a thousand-dollar bill on the counter. He grabbed the drinks and left.The bill was bogus of course, one side was a thousand and the other was a note. A bet between my husband and Kevin.One Night with Beth. Whoever wins gets Beth all night.Signed by my husband and four other guys, Kevin being one. Why would he give me this? It was obviously a joke. But the idea aroused me that all these guys were playing golf with me as a prize. My husband being one of them.Wanting to put the bill in the trash, I looked at it for a bit and sat down in the kitchen. What did it mean? My husband came looking for me. I slid the bill over to him. “What’s this?”He sat down. “It’s a fake bill. We use them for gentlemen bets, you know ‘bet you a grand that…’ that kind of thing.”“Yeah, but you bet me! Want to explain?”“Actually, I didn’t. Kevin wrote that,” he explained.“And you signed it,” I pointed out his signature.“I did.”“And so of course you guys had a laugh and Kevin kept the bill as a joke to humiliate me with later,” I said, leaned back and crossed my arms.“No, Beth. That’s not it. He won the round,” my husband said and my mouth fell open.“You seriously want me to honor this bet? Is that where we are going. Unbelievable. I don’t think I have ever heard anything so, so… You’re both a couple of pigs. I’m not some possession, what the fuck were you thinking?”“Beth, I’m gay.”It was a punch to the gut. We sat there in silence. A thousand things running through my mind. I knew something was wrong; I had asked a thousand times. Part of me knew I didn’t want to know. I thought I was strong. I got up and left the room and locked myself in the bedroom.

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